If I Have to Tell You One More Time...: The Revolutionary Program That Gets Your Kids To Listen Without Nagging, Reminding, or Yelling

I have subscribed to Amy's video program, I've read her book, and I've listened to portions of the book on Audible. I'm still having a very hard time implementing the tools she recommends.Here is an example: Amy has a tool called "when . . . then". You tell then child "when you finish cleaning up after dinner, then you can have your treat" or something similar. What she doesn't go over for each of her tools is how to handle all the uncontrollable whining, tantrums and continuous fighting that ensues when you try to initiate these boundaries.For the "when . . . then" tool, one of her examples is to say to the child "when you load the dishwasher, then you can come to the table for dinner.". What she doesn't cover is what to do when the child refuses to do the chore and doesn't care about the "privilege". She simply says the child will have no choice but to comply. But the child does have a choice: not to eat dinner. Now, I don't really care whether my child misses a meal, but it's one of my husband's hot buttons, and he goes nuts if that is going to happen.Amy has similar recommendations for ensuring routines. I am big on routines in my house. But I still can't get my boys to get ready for bed independently without playing around, dawdling, etc. I tell them it cuts into their story time, I give them the "when . . . then", etc. It doesn't change their behavior. They just continue to do what they are going to do. They get a shorter story time, but if they dawdle or misbehave so much that there isn't any time left for stories, all hell breaks loose! Amy doesn't give any advice for handling that because I somehow still need to get them calmed down enough to go to sleep on time (if they don't get enough sleep, one or them will be especially cranky the next day). In her book and audio, she simply states that they will learn to comply because they have no choice. I don't know how many times I'm supposed to go through the same drama when they lose a privilege, but I've now been through the same situation many times, and it doesn't change their initial behaviors.There are other facets to her advice that also seem to be missing. For implementing mind, body, and soul time, she doesn't say what to do when 15 minutes isn't enough. One of my boys, in particular, loves mommy time so much, he wants mommy time ALL the time. I have to be very stern on drawing the boundaries and explaining that I have had fun, but I need to do other things. This doesn't help in getting him to start playing on his own (without bothering his brother) or help him figure out what to do on his own. He's old enough and fully capable, but when he wants more attention, he won't give up, follows me in the kitchen, whining and carrying on, etc. So what do I do with that?So I think in most recommendations in the book, what is missing is what to do when her recommendation doesn't work right away or the child persists and persists and persists and persists, especially after instituting a consequence. I am guessing her premise is that if you are consistent, then the misbehaviors in reaction to the consequence will end, but when? The book seems to indicate that it won't take long, but so far, that is not my experience.I do see a little better results using these techniques with my older son (7), who tends to be easy going. For my younger boy (6), he tends to be more strong willed, so he'll just choose not to have the privilege or throw huge fits. I don't give into him (and never have), but I'm still left not being able to improve the initial behavior that started the conflict.

This is the absolute best behavioral book I have read ! It has great information and skills to use and they really do work.

As a first-time mom, I've read at least a dozen books on parenting : "Make Children Mind Without Losing Yours," "1-2-3- Magic," "The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child," "Supernanny: How to Get the Best From Your Children," etc. From what I read, saw on TV and was told by more-seasoned parents, I thought time-outs and occasional spankings (light swats on the bottom really) would help keep my young daughter in line and straighten out disobedience or bad attitudes. There was little to no effect on my daughter. Time-outs just seemed to make her upset and withdrawn and me to feel bewildered; why weren't these punishments and systems working? I was following conventional wisdom but our family-life was slowly deteriorating instead of improving. Defiance was becoming a regular reaction from my daughter. It was so frustrating because I couldn't figure out how to make things better.After trying the first tool that McCready teaches, the change in my 4-year-old daughter was within 48 hours. I was shocked. She is now more relaxed, happy to play on her own and I no longer feel like the "bad guy." The tools that McCready espouses take time to implement but I've found that I used to spend about that much time each day in frustration with and resentment towards my daughter. Most of that is now gone within weeks.For instance, just trying to get out the door in the mornings or get her settled in bed at night took a lot of time and that time spent was rarely pleasant. It was chock-full of me doing a lot of nagging and my daughter whining and dragging her feet. Using McCready's tools, these things now run smoothly, my daughter is happier and content, and I look forward to those times instead of dreading the prospect of regularly facing my daughter in what often felt like a full-fledged battle of wills.The book by itself provides all the basic information and enough detail to implement the tools. For me though, when I saw the wonderful and rather quick results from my "test-drive" of McCready's parenting approach, I decided that I wanted even more elaboration. I enrolled in her online program which has changed our family-life and has been worth every penny if not more.Buy the book and read it. Try implementing just the first tool and see the changes that occur in your child(ren). The results will speak for themselves.

Really loving this book so far! Only up to chapter 3 but can already feel the changes in my perception of the things mentioned. Great value for money, delivered on time!

Great book a lot help how to start a positive parenting with lots of examples and ways how to use it in practice

I'm so so glad I bought this while my daughter was still very young. The tools are great and within a few days of Mind, Body of Soul time our family unit was alot happier. She now contributes to the household and we hardly have any defiance! Just wonderful - can't thank Amy McCready enough. one very happy family :)

The best book I've ever read. I'm sorry I didn't buy it earlier. It makes understanding kids behavior so much easier, I'm sure it will make a difference

Excellent, just what I needed to discipline my kids who were driving me mad...