Speaking for the Dying: Life-and-Death Decisions in Intensive Care (Chicago Series in Law and Society)

I read this book after losing both of my parents in circumstances that were eerily similar to those described in Speaking for the Dying. This book offers a thoughtful, sensitive and highly-informed analysis of what happens when end-of-life decisions have to be made by someone other than the patient. The strength of the book is that it offers to those of us who will face this experience, whether as patient or decision-maker – which is just about everyone, an opportunity to observe how others, family, friends, even medical professionals, navigate these turbulent waters. It is a relatable account of the conversations, tensions and extraordinarily wrenching decisions that must be made. It shows real people confronting the many challenges involved in making these decisions, the conflicting feelings, the tension between not giving up and treating your loved one with kindness and dignity. There are no easy answers. Nevertheless, after reading Speaking for the Dying, I felt more a part of the human experience, and perhaps more forgiving of myself for having stumbled through those challenging times.I gave this book to my husband, daughters and sister in 2019. My hope is that my family will be able to talk through some of the fundamental questions presented when we need someone else to make decisions about topics no one wants to talk about. Taking responsibility, thinking of the patient, knowing something about what the patient wanted – these are among the lessons that Susan Shapiro’s work offers.