Going to Pieces without Falling Apart: A Buddhist Perspective on Wholeness

Being with the moment is happiness and meditation teaches how to achieve the same, it is told. Nice examples of cases; provides great opportunity to ponder. When you feel time is slipping, you are not with the moment. When you are with the moment, time does not slip and you are in sync with time. Anxiety removes the happiness in the moment. Anxiety can be caused by looking forward to the result. A nice case was told about a woman enjoying her moments waiting for her company, a married man. Perhaps she never took the risk of enjoying those moments when she was looking for bachelors, worrying about whether he will marry her. Strange the way mind works. So to be with time and enjoy the moment, one has to feel the transience of material and emotional relations. Nothing is permanent. Results can be changing and never easily predicted. This requires training from childhood. A child should be given enough room to experiment without supervision (intrusion) of the mother, so that it can manage to understand the transient nature, success or failure, of course without it feeling absence of the protection of the mother… In lighter vein; a Buddhist teacher who loses his dear one, cries his heart out for a quite a few days. The disciples confront him, telling him that he has been teaching them about illusionary nature of world and he is not practicing it. He told “losing a dear one is a Painful illusion”.

This is the first book about the melding of Buddhism and Western psychotherapy that I've read. I'm not well-versed in either of these fields, but I found this book to be helpful and interesting. Though it felt a bit abstract at times, this book will give you an introduction to how these two fields complement each other. The author shares a number of personal stories throughout, demonstrating his journey along a path to satisfaction. I have a feeling that if I come back to this book after traveling along my path of study for a while, I'll appreciate it even more.

This is not a good book for either beginner meditation or beginner Buddhism. There are plenty of others that will get you started that are easier to read and understand. However this is a great book if you are already on the path and are looking to go deeper. He explores feelings of emptiness and the illusion of self. Although I had already studied these ideas elsewhere it was great to read about them from a more mental health perspective. I have been able to put into practice some of the teachings and they are proving so far to be life-changing. My relationship with both myself and others has improved and I’m in a happier place.

Epstein is so facile and disciplined in the art of deconstructing Eastern and Western thought that he is free of the constraints of any cognitive anxiety incumbant to the marriage of these philosophical contexts. Not always so for the reader. To find the pieces of Dr. Epstein's deep convictions without falling apart, it is best to resist the temptation to dwell too deeply on every thought, and avoid the frustration that comes when you first realize that this is not a "how to" book. Nonetheless, it is a fine background piece for integrating traditional Western psychological theory (and Eastern religion) into a Bhuddist (Zen) perspective, while addiing a dash of cognitive behaviorism for good measure. I think the appeal is primarily to professionals, because, absent some background in Western psychological theory, it may well be jabborwocky. Nonetheless, I found it interesting and thought provoking. I am currently looking for a Zen Master to help me unravel the toxic strings that bind me.

Its good

Here's the quick summary of this book: there are issues, like existential aloneness and death as the end of consciousness that most of us like to dress up in opposition to their Ultimate Truth. We prefer to believe, for example, that we aren't alone, after all, there are all of those people at work that report to us that naturally think we are messianic. As for death, well, probably it's a Big Picnic and Elvis, JFK, and our favorite comedian will be there (see Echo Bodine's books for details). These are issues, which if confronted honestly, aren't going away with 100 mg of Zoloft or a nice walk in the park. Nor are they classic phobias in which putting a bottle of spiders on your bed stand for a week will freak you out so badly via the somewhat euphemistically entitled technique of "flooding" that soon you will think of spiders as your Little Helpers, catching and eating all those nasty flies that are in your house. Epstein has a different answer: meditate and get right into the issues; they aren't going anywhere and you can't resolve them by doodling in the external world. Stand right in the middle of the fire of the fear of death and the depression upon the conclusion that you are ultimately alone; meditate on the issues and pursue them by looking within...and therein is the only chance of peaceful acceptance, which Epstein asserts is lots better than denial. I would have given the book five stars, but I took one star off for the author's picture on the back of the book. The photographer was apparently fond of the "look at me pull my own finger" look for his subjects.

Although small in size, Epstein's book presents quite a powerful synthesis of Buddhism and psychotherapy. Amazingly, he brings clarity to the paradoxical concepts of: feeling whole by accepting emptiness; finding happiness by letting go; feeling more at peace by tolerating uncertainty; and being able to go to pieces in order to avoid falling apart. I've already read this book twice, and I have no doubt that each successive read will uncover more gems hidden inside. The writing is superb, the presentation is compelling and lucid, and the way Epstein is able to distill and integrate key concepts of Buddhism and psychotherapy is beyond impressive. Epstein concludes the book by reflecting on how his being able to incorporate the Buddhist principles into his life has "allowed my awareness to be stronger than my neurosis" (p. 181). May we all achieve such a state. :)

I've given this book over and over again to people I learn are in great stress, or who are experiencing the kind of emotional pain and suffering it's hard to describe. Written by a Jewish man who is a doctor, a psychiatrist and a Buddhist, the book provides insight from several cultures, several belief systems and from the kind of professional/personal introspection that is invaluable. It helped me at a time when I was uncertain how to face another day. Get it. Read it. Give it.

A must read... I recommend doing it in a slow-paced manner to gain all the knowledge!!!

I've read this book twice before, and I still get a lot of out it. Not just an essay in book form, it builds. Wonderful writing.

I came to this book after reading '10% happier' and 'Real happiness'. I have been practicing meditation for about six months only. I wish I had started before but knew very little about it. I feel it's a fundamental part of my life now and I will want to practice until the end. It has changed my life in such a profound way that I don't understand why it isn't something taught at school. As my father was a psychiatrist and psychoanalist, I am deeply grateful for this book reconciling therapy and Buddhism.

Absolutely loved this book an read it in a matter of days. An inspiring story of how we could find inner comfort and help to overcome deep fears and everyday challenges. Is an easy read that I really recommend to anyone that appreciate the value of Buddhist religion even without being a deep believer.

Una prospettiva nuova e vincente sulla psicodinamica e la meditazione tradizionale. Interessanti spunti per la gestione delle relazioni nella vita di tutti i giorni.